One Single Impression: What's It Like?
What's It Like?
to be on top wound up too tight
then flying loose no holding hand
crashing the walls rolling on edge
spinning too fast circling wobbling
jump off that top while you still can
your bones will break your mind will bend
what a dead end--free at the game
kids abusing--doll head bobbling
Copyright © 2009 Jimmiehov. All Rights Reserved
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to be on top wound up too tight
then flying loose no holding hand
crashing the walls rolling on edge
spinning too fast circling wobbling
jump off that top while you still can
your bones will break your mind will bend
what a dead end--free at the game
kids abusing--doll head bobbling
Copyright © 2009 Jimmiehov. All Rights Reserved
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
What's It Like to be a Christmas tree? (click here)
Find more poems at One Single Impression
"What's It Like" as prompt,
suggested by Alana of After the Pole
Find more poems at One Single Impression
"What's It Like" as prompt,
suggested by Alana of After the Pole
.
Painting is easy when you don’t know how, but very difficult when you do. Edgar Dégas
The same may go for poetry? (whatever, I enjoy painting with the words!)
The same may go for poetry? (whatever, I enjoy painting with the words!)
Labels: Humor, One Single Impression, Poem, Syllabic Form, Toys
posted by Jim @ 5/10/2009 12:03:00 AM
19 comments
19 Comments:
Ouch! I can't stand to watch skate-boarding, it send tingles of fear up my "yellow" spine.
Well said Jim. Your muse is really giving you the leg up!
BTW: 5 children (4 daughters/1 son), 13 grandchildren, 1 great grandson (That's four grand-daughters and 10 grandsons) ... I started early; I had a Mississippi's Cotton Field mentality. Did I pass it on? ;)
A fast and furious one there. Nicely done.
Enjoyed this one, Jim. I can't imagine moving as swiftly as this poem does.
I enjoyed this very much!
Almost out of breath reading this, what a wild ride!
I remember that sensation for twirling during dance class-- the closer you hold your arms and hands the faster you spin. What joy! There is something dizzy about your poem.
Ahhh...really letting lose after being wound too tight. What would it be like?
Hi Jim--
Welcome home!
I'm with Pam--your poem made me dizzy and winded--what it must be like!
Thank you for this--well done!
puts my head for a spin!
Oh, yes, that does send me spinning, indeed.
Surely a wild ride~ nicely done!
great description of heady fatal attractions...and a sobering second verse. well written
Enjoyed this one. Really fast pace.
Hi Jim, I liked your poem, I know that wound up feeling all too well. You asked at my blog about the repetitive nature of my poem - if it has a name. It definitely does, but I cant remember it - you start with the second line of each verse, and the last line of the preceding verse becomes line three in the next verse. The last line of the last stanza is the same as the first line of the first stanza. I tweaked some of my repeating lines so they weren't always exact replications. I copied this style from a poem at Mondays Poetry Stretch at Miss Rumphius Effect blog. I hope this helps.
Wow Jim,this is a very powerful poem Your images just leap of the page and your words sound like the images you created. Very well done my friend.
love,Melanie-bd
it was a dizzy ride that felt so real jim... it's all abt the freedom to choose... we learn along the way...
I tried not to cheat but I did. Loved it!
Reminds me a bit of Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, Jim!
BTW, I am not My Bellavia's aunt - I am one of her sisters! :-D But thank you for your kind words!
The Aunt Barbara Janice speaks of in her poem this week was our Aunt Barbara, our father's sister. She passed away a few years ago, but remains with us in our hearts. I think this week Auntie Barbara was especially on Janice's mind because another one of our father's sisters passed away last week.
Hi Jim~ Yes I know the feeling of being wound too tight then releasing an out of control. Works on all sorts of levels doesn't it? Good work! Your pics looks wonderful~
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