Saturday, August 11, 2018

The Shopping Trip -- a Poem

I'm sitting here in the store just waiting
Waiting for you
Shopping you are, bras undies--I'm fainting
And slippers too

Wait by the side door in a big red chair
'Til you're finished
I'm writing a poem my rhyming is fair
Good one I wished

But should I write of the sandals I bought
You look I bought
My shopping is done I wait while you shop
Fish could of caught

But I'm not fishing good husband I am
Buy you Moon and stars put them in a can
 _ _ _ _

 - Poem Copyright, Jimmiehov 2018, All Rights Reserved
 - I'm linked with Marian in the Imaginary Garden at http://withrealtoads.blogspot.com/2018/08/fussy-little-forms-cavatina.html?m=1
Marian wants us to write a Cavatina form poem, with a set meter and rhyme scheme. Like this:
  •Ten-syllable non-rhyming line,
  •Alternating with a four-syllable rhyming line,
  •Repeated at least three times,
  •Ending with a ten-syllable line couplet.
It was a fun project, I really did write most of it while waiting for Mrs. Jim to finish her shopping.   I LOVE THAT GAL.
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5 Comments:

At Sunday, August 12, 2018 1:13:00 AM, Blogger Jim said...

A form error here, in the Cavatina form the longer odd lines are NOT SUPPOSED to rhyme except for the last two which SHOuLD rhyme. I'll not fix it tonight, maybe not ever.
http://poetscollective.org/poetryforms/cavatina/
..

 
At Sunday, August 12, 2018 5:53:00 AM, Blogger Old Egg said...

I just enjoyed the read Jim and didn't check the form as I bend the rules occasionally.

 
At Sunday, August 12, 2018 7:55:00 AM, Blogger Marian said...

I think it's okay for the final couplet to rhyme (just not required), and I love that yours does. This is a really wonderful snapshot, Jim. I like it a lot! I can see you sitting there in that husband-chair jotting down your notes. Love, love that final line. :)

 
At Sunday, August 12, 2018 6:34:00 PM, Blogger Sara McNulty said...

Many a fiddling husband has been in that chair, waiting, waiting, waiting. Well done, Jim!

 
At Thursday, August 16, 2018 1:02:00 PM, Blogger Margaret said...

... I always smile when I see a man sitting and eating in a store department's chair... (dreaming of fishing, no doubt)

 

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