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Sunday, March 29, 2015

The Ride -- Sunday Challenge poem

 
The Ride;
Follow, coach, ride, here
 
Where ever you lead I'm sure to follow (a)
Paths unknown tend to be a bumpy ride (b) 
Even so I'll take the chance, you're my coach (c) 
In your steps I want to be, now and here (d) 
 
Say it softly and nice, your words I'll hear (d)
Help me to love, encourage me and coach (c) 
In my ear, after you will I follow (a) 
Cooing and love-struck I'll happily ride (b)
 
Side by side, the two of us, we will ride (b) 
Hugs and kisses with more still to follow (a)  
When roll is called always I'll answer, "Here"! (d) 
Every trip will be nice, first class or coach (c) 
 
Can't lose me now, I'm sitting in your coach (c)
Right here, flowers in my heart, did you hear (d) 
Two make a whole, you please enjoy your ride (b) 
My wheels after yours, way they will follow (a)  
 
Body and soul, coach they'll always follow (a)
Here I'll be, stuck with you for my big ride (b) 
_ _ _ 
 
Photo and Poem Copyright © 2015 Jimmiehov
All Rights Reserved
 
 - Today, I am linking again with The Real Toads, this time with Marian in her Tuesday post, The Tuesday Platform: NaPoWriMo Eve .  During the month of April a lot of poets and 'poem' writers like me write ONE POEM for/on EACH DAY OF THE MONTH.  I don't think I will do that, I may start out. But sure to look for and read the efforts of the others.
 
 - Saturday I linked with Björn Rudberg of The Real Toads, at Sunday Mini Challenge - not a sestina but close.   Bjorn wanted us to write a 'near' sestina form poem, mostly shortened. 
 - Composing staying within it's rhyme scheme was a bit hard for me to follow.  This is the required rhyme scheme:  A - (Follow) B - (Ride) C - (Coach) D - (Here/hear);   D - C - A - B;   B - A - D - C;   C - D - B - A;   A - B. with the four words here in parenthesis being words which I chose for this poem.  The four letters correspond to the position of each rhyme word.
 - Oh yes, the meaning and/or context of each of four words are supposed to be different for each line.

13 comments:

  1. Good to follow the coach & the big ride ~ The picture gave me a smile too ~ I had to write down the pattern too to get the form ~ Good job on the rhyming pattern & scheme Jim ~

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  2. I really like your poem, Jim! Down to earth is my kind of writing. It is nice to have someone to ride with side by side, and it is good to enjoy being together for the 'big ride.' You followed the form well.....nicely done!

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  3. Super sweet, Jim, glad you have sweet coach! K.

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  4. This is such a beautiful depiction of love. Too often these days love doesn't last beyond infatuation.

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  5. Wonderful and sweet, love is supposed to last like that isn't it? Yes I did write down the word first just like you. It's a tricky form to write, but you managed so well. Thank you for writing to the challenge.

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  6. this is so sweet...enjoy the happy ride many more years Jim...a beautiful form poem..

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  7. Wonderful proposal in this neat form., Sometimes it's best for a state of being, but you make it move forward through dialogue. Very cool.

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  8. Love it when you get all sweet and mushy ..

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  9. I love "right here, flowers in my heart." Wonderful poem, Jim, and I am impressed you managed the form so well. I am flummoxed by it.

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  10. This is a lovely and sincere poem. I'm sure your wife was thrilled to read it.

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  11. This is admirable, Jim. Honestly the sestina makes my head want to explode and I could not comprehend Bjorn's version at all, my brain just refuses! I like the specificity of the repeating word "coach" together with the other words that are softer, more general, easier. Good work!! Plus, it's sweet. Bonus!

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  12. Your romantic side is showing, Ha I luv this. Thank you for dropping by to read mine. I see you linked to different sites. Remember my Monday WRites every Monday at my site 'verses' a Monday meme

    Much love...

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  13. What a sweet ride love can be when it is devoted. Love this poem and the form is amazing JIm!

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